Escaping the Social Media Trap

Social media is still young, but most of us live like it’s running our lives. Apps like Instagram, TikTok, Youtube, and Pinterest don't just capture our attention, they consume it- day after day.

The reality is that while you think you're taking in ideas and information, the algorithm is set on one thing: getting you to spend as much time as possible scrolling on your devices.

Most people understand that social media is not making them happier, yet we always keep coming back to it.

Unfortunately, there are a lot of psychological games at play with the intent to keep you hooked.

Unpacking the Mind Games

There are many 'mind games' that these apps use to keep you scrolling. Once you know what they are, you'll start noticing them everywhere. These are just some of the ones that I catch the most:

Rage Baiting: If the goal is your time and attention, there is no better way than by making you angry. People spend more time watching, commenting, and focusing on things they hate, which has led to an increase in negative and emotionally draining content online.

Habit Loops: By using a simple 'reward' system (through dopamine rushes, likes, and follows) these apps are able to create patterns in our minds. Often, we end up scrolling on social media without even knowing how we got there. This is due to changes within the patterns and habits of our brains, which lead to subconscious responses we might not even be aware of- and more view time.

Endless Scrolling: With a virtually never-ending stream of content, you can drift in and lose track of time without even meaning to. Instead of using the internet with an objective in mind, we get lost and distracted by the endless amount of content being pushed our way.

Fake Learning: There are hacks for everything and endless amounts of productivity content that leave you feeling accomplished- even when you've done nothing. This can leave us either overworked or having not done anything tangible to create the life we're dreaming about.

The reality is that while you think you're taking in ideas and information, the algorithm is set on one thing: getting you to spend as much time as possible scrolling on your devices.

There are countless issues to living our lives this way. The biggest one I have seen (and experienced first-hand) is the lack of joy we feel in our reality. Social media is an endorphin drug we can keep in our pocket 24/7 with very tangible effects on our well-being.

You open Instagram for ‘just a minute’... and suddenly you’re comparing your weekend to highlight reels, learning how to remodel your entire home, and feeling completely out of sync with reality.

People live in a reality filled with constant comparison, fear of missing out (FOMO), unrealistic standards for their home, finances, jobs, and lifestyles- and an easy escape when the discover real life isn't what they hoped it would be.

Our mind and time has become a commodity we no longer regulate- and the cost is our joy.

Luckily, there is hope.

Many people are waking up to the dangers of social media and looking for a change. If you're feeling overwhelmed at the thought of a life with less social media usage, don't worry- you aren't alone. One thing I talk about a lot is the fact that big, overnight changes rarely stick, and that is no truer than when it comes to our (very real) social media addictions.

Instead of a big change, start with:

Instead of a big change, start with phone check-ins

For now, don't even try to curb your social media addiction. Instead, just notice it. When you notice yourself scrolling on your phone, think about how you got there. Did you mean to start scrolling? Did it happen automatically? Make a mental note of the situation and then put the phone down. If it happens again (and it will), check in again, and then put the phone down.

The biggest problem with social media usage is that we usually don't even realize how much we are using it in the first place. By taking this step, you'll be ahead of the game and more aware of your patterns. If those patterns frustrate you, you can begin to work on changing them- later.

But for now, just make yourself aware, and know that you're not alone.

Keep it simple,

-Ashley 💛